*Draft* Comment policy

Somewhat late in the day, I realised I don’t have a comment policy here. I do have T&Cs on roughseas which sort of hints at blog policy, so I thought I should make a belated effort to provide something on Clouds.

  • First, the obvious: no homophobia, racism, sexism/misogyny.
  • Second, please don’t use abusive terms that stereotype and insult minority groups, eg calling someone lame, spastic, or various forms of referring to people as mad. I appreciate the last one is difficult when trying to discuss religious fanatics, just please use your judgement when trying to express the state of mind of fundagelicals – of any religion.
  • Third, you are however free to swear. Fuckwit and arsehole are perfectly acceptable.
  • Fourth, there is no moderation on first comments or any others. There are no blacklisted people on here. Currently.
  • Fifth, I don’t usually delete comments but if you are being totally tedious/insulting/a general PITA, I will.
  • Sixth, I don’t usually edit comments either, apart from spelling, especially when people ask/point out their typos. I did edit one comment last week, but wrote to the commenter to explain why.
  • Seventh, if you wish to insult people, or disagree with someone, please don’t have a go at their character or lifestyle (even if it might be accurate). Either criticise their views or call them an approved abusive name (see above).
  • Eighth, if there are links on a blog post, or in comments, and you choose not to follow them, you can expect to be told you should have read the links if you say something crass. It takes time to add links and it is courteous to read them before weighing in.
  • Ninth, again on links, commenters are welcome to add vids. Just be aware that I have no patience with them, but I know others watch/enjoy them. I will read all textual links.
  • Tenth, from to time I take the blog private so I can think about more important things like growing veg, flowers, walking round the beach. Any regular readers are welcome to browse previous posts by requesting access.

On a separate but related point, it should be fairly obvious to people that I sign in as roughseasinthemed. It is, quite frankly, annoying, that some people who also have an alias choose to call me by my first name. Just why? Do people lack the same respect for Arb, Ark, esme/sonmiuponthecloud, Philosophermouseofthehedge, ProfessorTaboo, tildeb? Do you ever see them called by their first names?

Unless you have special dispensation, could you possibly stick to roughseas? Many thanks.

So, there you have it. Probably nothing people didn’t know anyway.

I’ll accept any suggestions for improvement. Whether or not I carry them out is another matter.

PS. I have changed nested comments to five now. Because Arb moaned. So I am vaguely responsive.

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About roughseasinthemed

I write about my life as an English person living in Spain and Gibraltar, on Roughseas, subjects range from politics and current developments in Gib to book reviews, cooking and getting on with life. My views and thoughts on a variety of topics - depending on my mood of the day - can be found over on Clouds. A few pix are over on Everypic - although it is not a photoblog. And of course my dog had his own blog, but most of you knew that anyway. Pippadogblog etc
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67 Responses to *Draft* Comment policy

  1. Hariod Brawn says:

    Shit, I never realised you didn’t want to be known as **** and rather assumed I had adopted it from your own usage – clearly not. Apologies for the prior intrusions, but isn’t the cat rather out of the bag?

    Liked by 1 person

    • I’ve been blogging for what? Nearly ten years? Inevitably people learn my name through other private interaction. I just don’t like mixing the two. The first time someone did it, years ago, I was well pissed-off, especially as I never called her Diane in public. (She doesn’t blog any more.)
      If I wanted to be known as, say, alter ego no 53, then I would use that name, whether Leonora, Justine or whatever. I don’t see what’s wrong with sticking to someone’s blog name. Do I care if you are really called Hariod? No.
      Maybe I’d like to put the cat back in the bag. You all know what she looks like, just, you don’t have to describe her.

      Liked by 2 people

      • Hariod Brawn says:

        How come you never said before?

        Like

        • What, about the name thing? One annoying person years ago could be ignored. For years, no one else did it. Trouble is, know more people on blogs, some email you and use it from there, one or two pick up on the name, and it snowballs. Plenty of people called me roughseas, rough, and in Emma’s case recently, just R. Or there is RSITM. But familiarity and all that …
          Why not say before? Because I couldn’t be arsed to make a post about it. Or bleat at everyone who called me by my name. It seemed to fit however, on the bottom of a comment policy post. It’s double standards. Some people use their real names and call me by mine. Irritating, but not as annoying as the ones with an unreal name/alias who choose to ignore my pseudonym.

          Liked by 1 person

  2. @RSitM

    “I have changed nested comments to five now. Because Arb moaned. So I am vaguely responsive.”

    *Squeak, squeak, squeak*

    Nothing to see here but us squeaky wheels. πŸ™‚

    Liked by 2 people

  3. I am developing my response policy. It includes that I usually leave idiocy, to shame the commenter, but try not to encourage it.

    Like

    • Well, there is that. Of course, what one person views as idiocy, another views as Cameron being a saviour, for example.
      I think what I want to say, is no crass and idiotic discrimination of any type against any minority group/person, but, big but, we all view discrimination differently. Depending on where we are coming from. And I doubt we can alter that.
      You want to achieve reconciliation, so do I. Not always possible as you’ve said.
      But I want to stand up for my rights, as do you, and every other person.
      Sometimes there is no middle ground. At other times, we can connect differently.
      Hell, I don’t know.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. john zande says:

    Sounds fair, Marg

    Like

  5. “Third, you are however free to swear” – Fucking yeah!!!!

    Ahem.

    Just to point out that I did say that when sonmi became esme, that sonmi was no more, so I’d really prefer those who reference me, not to do so as esme/sonmicloud. Considering your (perfectly reasonable) request about re your own name, I find that you called me both names ironic and quite funny. But people don’t always realise as you said.Only one person continued to call me sonmi in a comment after I changed, as they said they wanted to do so. I said I’d not be replying to said comments in future because I am NOT sonmi now. Next week I might be Groovyfingers Electricteeth, Who can tell? But I agree with you entirely that whatever happens to be the name you yourself use, (unless told otherwise), should be the one you use. I quite like using R.S for you, but will stick to roughseas if you prefer.

    ESME upon the Cloud

    Liked by 1 person

  6. EllaDee says:

    Other than your very reasonable – and welcome on occasion when I’m really ticked off- dispensation to swear, for me all of the T&Cs were givens… but then I don’t get out much.
    You’ll always be roughseas to me… probably even if we ever meet in person πŸ™‚ I feel similarly about the alias issue but have resigned myself to bloggers who are more familiar with me -and have earned the right over the years and via regular interaction- referring to me by my real first name… I think it’s a perception thing, they believe it’s a nicer more personal touch… but I do object to newbies running with it, and have responded accordingly. The last thing we need is our real names coming up more than they already do in online search hits.

    Liked by 3 people

    • I don’t know what impelled me. Probably reading other amazingly restrictive T&Cs.
      But as sometimes topics on here are deemed controversial, by others, not by me obviously, I thought it might be helpful. Who knows? πŸ˜€
      I’ve read about people finding cussing and whatever else Americans call swear words and deeming people as illiterate, so I don’t want people to feel they can’t use a vernacular of choice, so long as it doesn’t disrespect minority groups. Aus has fine swearwords πŸ™‚
      Hey, I’ve known your real name for ages too. It’s hardly a secret. But that isn’t your blog name, so therefore …
      I agree with your comments. Partic newbies. And yes, I suppose it is a personal touch. The cynic in me would say some like to vaunt superiority by saying I call her by her first name – but I think that’s a tiny minority. But, have alias/pseudonym for a reason.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. davidprosser says:

    Abject apologies for the intrusion. I never realised what problems it could cause.
    Hugs

    Liked by 2 people

  8. makagutu says:

    Can I still use Rs?
    Looking at those to and not to dos, I think it will not take a struggle from me to be compliant

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Totty says:

    Having read Abs addressing you as @RSitM, I can’t help but think of you now as Arsetum…:)

    Liked by 3 people

  10. Sonel says:

    Got it and apologies RS. I am also one of the guilty ones. Won’t happen again. πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Everything’s been pretty well touched on by now. Impressive you sorted it all out and clearly stated things.
    Glad it’s not just me that gets a bit miffed if commenters can’t use the blog handle instead of given name. Some bloggers have good reasons for not using their actual names – either rude of naive to ignore that.
    Other things do rightfully take priority at time – like nice weather. Paws waves and out.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Most people behave anyway.
      But yes. If I wanted to use Jane Smith I would do so. I don’t. So therefore, what is wrong with roughseas, or RSITM, or RS, or whatever. I don’t disrespect other pseudonym/anonymous bloggers and they are the ones who annoy the most. I can understand people who use their own names thinking it’s no big deal, but we aren’t all the same. Some of us like an alias. Simple as that. I’ve actually thought a few times about scrapping and starting over, it’s pissed me off that much.
      Chilly weather here. Well as chilly as it gets. Snoozes from the Snows.

      Liked by 1 person

  12. violetwisp says:

    I hope you don’t mind me critiquing this.

    “First, the obvious: no homophobia, racism, sexism/misogyny.” But transphobia welcome when under the guise of putting women first?
    “Second, please don’t use abusive terms that stereotype and insult minority groups” unless it’s intentionally using incorrect gender pronouns to insult trans people?
    Just thinking of a conversation on a prior post.

    “It is, quite frankly, annoying, that some people who also have an alias choose to call me by my first name. Just why?”
    Because loads of people called you ****, and you never suggested there was even a slight problem with it. Quite frankly, I felt like I personally was being rather cold and distant by sticking to Roughseas. It’s a familiarity thing. I should have called you **** but we were prickly enough with each other that Roughseas seems more appropriate. You’re chastising your blogging friends for not reading your mind – poor people that felt they had to apologise!

    (Hope this doesn’t fall under ‘tedious’ and get me blacklisted!)

    Like

    • I’ll start with the last one. No. Not tedious, perfectly valid.

      1) Ah. Why am I not surprised? I listed my priorities as, this is, surprisingly, my blog. As you say, everything is fluid and we all see things differently. I can set whatever parameters and make whatever policies I like. You can fight for transactivists, Syrian refugees, minority Islamic groups in the UK, as much as you like. They aren’t my chosen β€˜causes’.

      2) See above. What does interest me here are words that demean women, imply the default for anything is male, and/or discriminate against homosexuals (eg faggot, insulting something by calling it gay suggesting it is inferior), and people with mental or physical illness. I’m not a catch-all, and I’m not professing to be.

      3) I’m a woman. We’re not known for being assertive, we don’t want to offend people, don’t you know? I explained it to Hariod briefly, if you read that reply. So every time someone calls me by my name, I’m supposed to say, ‘Don’t do that’? And then I would be thought to be whiney and picky.

      Quite frankly ‘violet’ I should have taken a leaf out of your book and never let anyone know my real name. However when somebody pays me the courtesy of an email, I think it’s reasonable to be a real person. I was wrong and made a mistake. Sometimes we all fuck up.

      However I’m not chastising my blogging ‘friends’ for not reading my mind. If anything I’m pointing out they have taken liberties for which no express permission was granted.
      Did you read the comments by Phil/PMOTH and EllaDee? I don’t call them ***** or ****, nor do I call Totty Teabag *********. It’s a simple matter of respecting someone’s choice. Somewhat like gender pronouns.

      It hardly takes a genius to work out that if someone doesn’t use their real name it’s because they don’t want their real name to be used. Or does it? Do you call Clare Flourish by her real name on the blogosphere?

      Liked by 1 person

      • violetwisp says:

        How do you know my name isn’t Violet? I’m in a constant state of seethe that everyone feels free to drop the Wisp. I did love it when SOM called you Rough, and enjoyed using it a couple of times. πŸ™‚

        Like

        • I seem to remember a post somewhere where you said it wasn’t. But maybe I’m dreaming. You write a lot of posts.
          I’m sorry about that violetwisp. I will remember in future. Violet of the Wisp.
          SOM wasn’t the first. Johanna called me it over on roughseas, but then dropped it for, yes, the obvious. She moved from cold, distant, prickly to ‘familiarity’ as you call it.

          Like

  13. Jeannie says:

    It’s taken me an age to find your blog – well one of them (and this isn’t the blog I was actually looking for so apologies for this not being perhaps the place to leave this news). I just wanted to let you know that Marvin The Hollow Hound from Scotland, has died. He was 17 and I am heartbroken. 16.5 years of love, laughter and totally glorious memories. I wanted to tell you as for a long time we used to email, back in the more innocent dog blog days. Feel free to not publish this comment – I simply just wanted you to know. Funny thing though how I found you – I googled Marvin and this link came up. His spirit lives on. J

    Like

  14. Jeannie says:

    I meant to add, I don’t blog anymore, but one thing I’m glad about is that I kept his blog, just made it private. It’s a great comfort at this sad time, to look back and remember so many happy times. I’ll finish now and get out of your hair, and also hope I have been relatively polite πŸ˜„. I do know about Pippa, Someine told me recently – grief is the price we pay for love. I will just leave it at that. J .

    Like

    • Thanks Jeannie. Sorry for the late reply. I did wonder about Marv as he was a similar age to Pippa, ok, a bit older, I think I looked a while back, but as you once said, what more can a twelve-year-old dog bark? It did feel a bit like that.

      Like

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