The Emperor’s New Clothes.
Or maybe those of the Empress.
Sitting in the bus station the other day, ie a bus station in Spain, I was watching everyone faffing around with their ‘phones. As you do. Even I do it. Mindless distraction.
The trouble with sticking your nose in a book is that you might miss the bus (Gus), or maybe people can’t/don’t read books these days. So ‘phone messing is easier.
Eventually one of these ‘phone women got up. I couldn’t believe it. I could see every orifice in her body, and I’m not just talking about her mouth.
I struggled not to look, I was so surprised.
Now, before I sound like the ‘these women are asking for it’ brigade, I’ll write a little more about skimpy clothing.
1. Our town in Spain is a beach resort. Women wander around the streets in bikinis.
2. I have worn similar skimpy clothing.
3. I have visited nudist beaches, without my clothes, I add quickly.
To expand upon these points.
After the Franco régime was dead in the water or muerto en el agua, one of the good things was that it was no longer illegal to sunbathe nude. You could take off your clothes on whatever beach you wanted.
Mostly women bathe topless, some bathe nude. Men don’t usually. And then you have the nudist beaches. It goes without saying we have one in our village. (We have everything!).
One day, we were lying there happily enjoying the sun and I heard strange noises. What’s that? I asked sunny warm Partner. ‘Oh, just some guy having a wank.’
I turned round. He wasn’t joking. Never did discover who the man was interested in. Me or Partner?
We didn’t sunbathe in the same place after that.
There was also the day I was on my own down the beach. Peaceful, quiet, not hot but nicely warm. A swim and a dry off in the sun. I was half-way there, ie I was topless. The beach was pretty empty. Some sleazearse came and plonked himself two inches away from me. Spaniards and personal space do not co-exist.
I turned over. As in, you can look at my clothed arse rather than my bare tits.
After he’d made some rather blatant propositions, asked for a date, asked for lunch, I said I was going home for lunch.
‘Oh with me?’
‘No, with my husband.’
Just honestly. He must have been at least 20 years younger than me too.
You want me to provide lunch for you and sex??????
Been there done that.
I have a photo of me in similar shorts to the ‘View Every Orifice Woman.’ Mostly it was in the family garden but I suspect I may have worn them on holiday too. For which I blame my parents for being totally blind. I also have a photo of VEOW but I’m not posting it, although she was sitting down when I took her pic, but unfair to identify her.
I sat on the step today with Partner at lunchtime and watched the women walk by. I walk down Main Street and look at the difference in clothing between women and men.
Give me one good reason why women wear the least clothing possible and men wear at least a T shirt and a long pair of shorts?
Yes, of course, this is a feminist post. What else did you think it would be?
But if men can wear knee-length shorts and a T shirt in summer – why can’t women? The need to acquire that delectable tan? To show off whatever assets you have? Some would be better off not doing so, as they have rather too many assets, but that’s not the point of this post.
Bikini around the town?
Walking around town in a bikini. Or orifice revealing shorts. Should you? Why would you want to? Societal ie patriarchal pressure?
I would not recommend it. Not because I don’t agree with people being free to wear what they want, I do, but mostly we do it because of subliminal conditioning. Look at me, I am soooo gorgeous and sexy. I am for sale, I am available, or whatever.
There is a place for nudity, minimal clothing, invariably at the beach, or a swimming pool, or your own back garden.
Years ago we went to Seville in December. It was cold (well, that’s relative) and raining. Anyway, it was Spain and we were on holiday so we wore shorts. And decided it was inappropriate so our next city visits included trousers in winter.
In Morocco in late June, I wore a long-sleeved shirt and trousers. I was treated with the utmost respect wherever I went.
While I’m always happy to break rules and flout convention, I think there is a time and place for doing so. Or perhaps I’m breaking the rules by not wearing minimal clothing that shows off as much of my body as possible. I don’t want to look sexually attractive (if that’s possible in your 50s because we all know, the younger the woman, the sexier they are).
The bottom line. So to speak. What am I wearing today? When I went to the shops and did the sandwich delivery service and sat on the pavement with Partner during his lunch break.
His camo-styls shorts with nice big strong pockets, just above the knee. A pair of scruffy trainers. And a sleeveless vest thing. Well, I do have rather nice shoulders after all.
Oh and some green beads. I have no idea what they are. I forget. They come from Brazil.
Which leads me nicely to Ella Dee who has given me an award.
The Blogger Award. I have to answer these questions.
1. How did you come to reside where you are today?
We left the UK to go to Spain for a different life before we got too old. Except we’ve always been doing that anyway, eg Australia, India, Italy … and decided to buy somewhere in Gib to put our eggs in different baskets.
2. What do you collect?
Rescue dogs? Bikes? Anything that’s unwanted really. Readers of roughseas will know that Partner is an ace scavenger from rubbish bins. If we can’t use it, give it away, it will get sold at a boot sale.
3. What is your favourite fragrance/aroma/smell?
Herbs, lavender, curry, smelly furry dog.
4. What book/s are you reading/writing now?
Black Cabs by John McLaren (one of our free acquisitions of course). Only part way through but a good tale about the stock exchange and London cabbies, so far, I’d recommend it. No book on the go for writing at the moment although there should be.
I’m also reading something called Tickle His Pickle but I got bored with that. Another freebie and you can work out what that is about from the title.
5. What jewelry do you wear daily?
Earrings. Silver at the moment as cheaper to replace when one falls out. The gold ones only come out for unsuccessful interviews or sometimes the bank.
Beads thrown around the neck from time to time as they make me look slightly smarter and I do live in a city. My grandmother’s diamond and gold half eternity engagement ring when I go to the bank.
After getting stung by a vicious bee in Spain above my wedding ring, I haven’t worn that since, as I thought either my finger or ring needed to be chopped off. I don’t even know why I was wearing it as I’d spent years not wearing it.
As I say above, appearances matter, and while I don’t agree with it, I accept we have to play the game. To some degree. Just twist it to suit ourselves.