Employers. What are they like? Just a voice level test, reading out the weather.
Really? So today’s ‘audition’ for a radio presenter post wasn’t quite what I had been led to believe. Oh no.
The 20 minute voice level test turned out to be 45 minutes, of which the first 20 minutes were:
- sifting through the eight news stories to put them in newsworthy order
- writing a headline to introduce the news bulletin that captured the main news points
- rewriting the said weather summary in ‘your own conversational way (see, not even that was what it had been portrayed to be)
- identifying photographs of nine people by name and position
- and preparing to introduce my own mock radio show with three songs and include a What’s On Diary after the second.
Unless I am missing something, that was not what I was told to expect. At all.
I am really pissed off with this. I don’t think it’s clever to throw something at people and see how they react, I think it is rude and discourteous. There would have been nothing wrong with saying – you’ll be expected to write an intro to the news bulletin, put stories in newsworthy order, summarise the weather forecast, and then do a more popular light-hearted intro to a few records. Let alone identifying poor photos of nine people, I only managed three, and I might point out only one of them was a woman who looked like any other
porn TV/film star or celebrity under the sun.
But a voice level test just reading out weather? No. It was duplicitous in the extreme. Or incompetent. After the last disastrous interview where corporate services apparently meant spraying cockroaches, when I got the ‘phone call for this one I even had the presence of mind to ask if this ‘audition’ was an interview, or involved anything else. I mean, what do you have to do to drag information out of people?
Also, if people are doing a voice level test – ha!! – I think water would be courteous. Was there any? I had to ask for it at reception and was told I could have some on the way downstairs.
Great. I’d just walked 25 minutes in baking heat, uphill, and there was no fucking water. I was finally given a cup, escorted to my cell to prepare for the test, and decided I wanted some more, so I cleared off to get another two cups, thereby losing a few minutes of prep time because they were so fucking inconsiderate they didn’t provide water for people.
I thought the instructions were unclear, so I went to ask. When I went into the studio, I asked some more questions.
Yeah, it’s great to get an interview, but I don’t like being treated like an idiot and given misleading information that means I’m not properly prepared.
‘We got a lot of applications,’ blah blah said Head Sherang. ‘We interviewed some people last week and we are seeing some more this week.’
Yes. I know. I took a peek at the list on the receptionist’s desk. I was second out of seven today. I’m a journalist remember? I read papers on people’s desks upside down. I walk over to ask for the time when I realise I didn’t clock the number of candidates. Not that it matters apart from curiosity.
Then I did my usual trick and chatted to the non-chatty escort on the way out and asked how long the interviews were going on for. Just today, the others were a couple of days ago. Ah. Don’t you love the different stories you always get??
When I did interviews I invariably went to fetch the candidate myself, a) it shows some respect and b) it saves an office oik giving away useful information. Or misinformation.
I actually offered to find my own way out – I’d already wandered around the place to get extra water so it wasn’t much further to go up the stairs to get out.
‘No, no, you can be escorted out, we need to bring the next candidate down anyway,’ said Head Sherang.
‘She’s not there,’ piped up escort.
‘She’s NOT there,’ said escort, clearly thinking he was losing it.
I figured they must be doing a rather clever appointment system, whereby the first candidate got twenty minutes prep time and then went into the studio for twenty minutes while the next candidate (me) got on with my prep. When I went into the studio the next candidate would be prepping. So candidates every twenty minutes for a 40 minute
interview voice level test. Either that or they were dragging the process out until well after 7pm!
Despite candidate no 3 (or 4?) not being in reception, I was still escorted out. Well, part way ie along a couple of corridors out of sight of the HS.
Whereupon, escort said: ‘You can find your own way out now can’t you?’
Yes dear, I offered to do that in the first place……
Back at reception, I noticed a couple of women on the sofa who looked like they were applying for a job with a modelling agency.
I didn’t. Because I was only going for a voice level test (ha!!), and it was mid afternoon, in hot sun, 25 mins walk away, I had on a pair of shorts, a vest (it did have sparkly sequins on though), and training shoes. The HS had on a shirt and dark trousers. The escort had on a rather tight short dress.
It would be a while before I would hear whether or not I was short-listed for an actual interview, the HS had said. Another one to put down to experience.